I have felt exactly like that.
A good person destroyed by the ring. The ring was Satan using the little piece in all of us that is bad or weak. It grabs ahold of it and makes it louder and stronger. All the good ones were affected by it, the elfin queen, Aragon, even Sam and Frodo.
Some people do well to avoid the ring completely, knowing what it will do to them. I admire the self-awareness they possess. The ring for me became acceptance, notoriety, attention, affirmation, achievement. If I had these things, I would be worthy and meet expectations. For me, I chased the ring and was drawn to it much like everyone was in the movie. And then, it crossed the line of me chasing it to it having me in its hold without even knowing.
I admire the support and help of the fellowship of the ring to help Frodo destroy the ring. Even though it threatened to overtake even him at times…they remained steadfast in their belief of him and continued to fight. I have felt like I have had a Fellowship of the Erica very much like this during this last year…loved and even carried at times when I felt I couldn’t take it anymore.
The scenes at the end, where Frodo’s exhausted, weak and can’t go any further, he was carried by someone who loved him in spite of his folly and being pushed away. Could that be Jesus for me? And the restoration team? Jesus with hands and feet? I am certain it was.
I am sad that my soul looked like Gollum for a while. I’m sad that at times it may even still resemble him. I try and my perfectionist identity does me no good. But, I am happy that I have identified it and am working on returning to myself again. Or rather, discovering a new self that is more real, more transparent, more like God intended me to be…without the ring.